By Antoine Bourcieu
– Many AUC students consider the Academic Building (AB) to be a second home. However, it can also be a dangerous place. Below are two maps based on testimony from fourteen AUC students, showing where they have injured or embarrassed themselves in the past couple of years.
Here are some of their most notable stories:
“On the first day of the mental health week, two hungry students (a friend and myself) went down to the cafeteria to get free granola bars,” said Zahra Cobben, a second year Science major. “With coffee in my hand and Lily [the friend] on my right, we spotted Kia (another friend) at the couches. Surprised as I was, I forgot to take the last step of the stairs, sprained my right ankle and out of reflex landed on both my knees with the coffee cup still in my right hand and the coffee splashing all over my face and clothes. All was fine until a loud Lily appeared with a scream and a laugh audible all over the AB causing faces to turn to me, on my knees, covered in coffee. Great day.”
“It happened right after a 9 o’clock Calculus class on the third floor,” said Robert Jovanov, a third year Science student. “I am definitely not a morning person. So, I was super sleepy and grumpy and was annoyed by pretty much everything, especially by loud noises. As I was about to take the stairs, Gordon (a friend) started shouting in an attempt to talk to Ruben (another friend) who was on the other end of the stairs [second floor, Darwin area] … They could barely hear each other anyways. So, I turned around and told Gordon that I am going downstairs and that I can tell Ruben to meet him on the third floor … Little did I know that it is not wise to look back while going in the opposite direction. So, as I turned back (facing the Darwin area) I found myself flying for a good two seconds before crushing my butt on the stairs and sliding all the way down. Tough luck, it was finals week, so Darwin’s area was flooded with people. They all heard the bang and turned around, and everything I could do was laugh and pretend it did not hurt.”
“During GIE (Global Identity Experience), with the 9 o’clock classes, it was so tiring that I was still half asleep when entering the revolving doors,” said Gideon Komen, a second year Social Science major. “So I thought we were already at the end, but instead just walked into the glass face first (with everyone looking of course). In conclusion: physical trauma – minimal, mental trauma – forever.”
When coming out of the third floor bathrooms, Matija Stefanovic, a first year Social Sciences major, attempted to grab the door handle but instead cut his wrist open on the edge of the placard. “I had no clue those placards could be that goddamn sharp,” he said. This uncommon injury resulted in a deep wound and significant bleeding.
All in all, for the sake of your physical and mental well being, beware of stairs, revolving doors, and avoid committee advertising placards in public bathrooms!
The Herring 